I'm drive I can fine osifer
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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