Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
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