i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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