the day after is always just damage control
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Randomize
