sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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