Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
