There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
