I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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