Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
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I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
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I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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