Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Its about making memories worth repressing
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
