After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
