yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
