Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
She needs sedatives and a leash
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
