I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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