Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
i think im in europe. pls send help
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
