I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
