So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Randomize
