Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Randomize
