I'm eating all of the evidence.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
