I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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