Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
40s are totally the cure
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Randomize
