it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
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I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
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Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
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