Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
