Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
