Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Just puked most of my soul out..
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