I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
