you guys were way drunker than both of me
My hand turned me down
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
time to smoke my breakfast
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
