I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Welp...herpes.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
