Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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