your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
