Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize