Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
