he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I need to sanitize my soul.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
