How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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