Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
