Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
