so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
you will always have a special place in my vag
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
