that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
