i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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