Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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