we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize