I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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