Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
