Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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