We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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