we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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