i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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