Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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