I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Randomize