god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
