i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
