i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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